[MIGHT AS WELL TRY IT OUT, TOO? He half wonders how it's written. Not that it matters, but names and meanings and all that. In any case, he repeats it one more time while looking at him, as if trying to see if the name fits him.
....Yeah he can't really think too deeply on something like that.]
Seems like it would fit to me, anyway. Better than calling you as a title or something. [Even if he's kind of gotten used to it.]
Doesn't matter. Remember what I told you before? That you should be more like own your person? Having "Kazuma" as a name is part of it now.
What I'm trying to say is... [He fumbles a little as he tries to word his thoughts.] Even if it's not your real name, doesn't mean you can't make it your own.
Ah. [They did talk about that. Be his own person...don't fret about the unknown details. Maybe that's why he never really gave it that much thought in the first place.]
. . .Yes, you're right. I'm Kazuma. [There's less hesitance this time when he says the name.] Thanks for the reminder.
. . .Friends. [It's weird how often Shizuo just casually throws out the word, when he doesn't feel like he's done much to qualify. He's not exactly putting in the effort to make friends, it was never a priority, a necessity to survive. Now it's not as clear cut, and he...actually enjoys Shizuo's company. Even if most of the time it's just for favors, or having a silent lunch, these casual meetings were a nice change of pace.]
We're friends? [For once he seems to acknowledge the idea to question it, even as the concept is still lost to him.]
[Small pause. It is a little strange for him to make the first move...usually it's other people. But sometimes Shizuo sees parts of himself in Disciple—no, Kazuma now—and that lets him take those awkward steps that he normally doesn't recognize or try to take.]
At least that's how I see you as. If it's a bother to you, though...
[He'd feel a little disappointed, but he could understand.]
For me, anyway. [Another small shrug before he looks back at the model of the city.] I don't really make a lot of friends often...but what's important to me is being able to trust them.
. . . [There's that T word again. He frowns, remembering when he told Shizuo he needed more time to give him an answer on that.]
I appreciate knowing that, but I don't know if I'm ready to say the same back, not when I have doubts about myself. Still...if I am able, you can depend on me to support you, as a friend. [That's a better answer than before. He is not shying away at the idea at least.]
...Well, I do have a few larger pieces that need to be cut into smaller ones. [There's a warm, reassuring smile on his face.] I would appreciate the company, regardless.
It will be fine. I...have faith you can handle this. [It's rather foreign to him to genuinely express this kind of confidence in someone else. And yet it felt...familiar, right.]
Even if something breaks, these things can be repaired and replaced.
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hatesviolence) wrote2019-10-24 12:15 am
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[MIGHT AS WELL TRY IT OUT, TOO? He half wonders how it's written. Not that it matters, but names and meanings and all that. In any case, he repeats it one more time while looking at him, as if trying to see if the name fits him.
....Yeah he can't really think too deeply on something like that.]
Seems like it would fit to me, anyway. Better than calling you as a title or something. [Even if he's kind of gotten used to it.]
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Time to check the journal.He nods, looking up at him.]Kazuma then. [The more he says it, the more he settles on it, even if it feels like he's just replacing a placeholder with another one for now.]
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Plus it's proof.
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...There's not much there though. For all I know, I'm just borrowing someone else's name right now, believing it to be my own.
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Doesn't matter. Remember what I told you before? That you should be more like own your person? Having "Kazuma" as a name is part of it now.
What I'm trying to say is... [He fumbles a little as he tries to word his thoughts.] Even if it's not your real name, doesn't mean you can't make it your own.
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. . .Yes, you're right. I'm Kazuma. [There's less hesitance this time when he says the name.] Thanks for the reminder.
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Anytime. It's what friends are for.
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We're friends? [For once he seems to acknowledge the idea to question it, even as the concept is still lost to him.]
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[Small pause. It is a little strange for him to make the first move...usually it's other people. But sometimes Shizuo sees parts of himself in Disciple—no, Kazuma now—and that lets him take those awkward steps that he normally doesn't recognize or try to take.]
At least that's how I see you as. If it's a bother to you, though...
[He'd feel a little disappointed, but he could understand.]
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You sure?
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[Hum.]
You're not a bad a guy and we get along all right. And you put up with my bullshit and helped me out a few times, so.
[Small shrug.]
Don't really need a lot of reasons.
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It's really that simple, huh? [Maybe that's just how Shizuo was. Don't complicate things, maybe that's why he appreciates his company.]
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[He looks back over at Kazuma.]
And I trust you.
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I appreciate knowing that, but I don't know if I'm ready to say the same back, not when I have doubts about myself. Still...if I am able, you can depend on me to support you, as a friend. [That's a better answer than before. He is not shying away at the idea at least.]
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I know, and that's fine. You got your own circumstances. But wanted you to know all the same, and if you ever need anything, you can call on me.
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...I don't know... I'm afraid I might accidentally break something.
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Even if something breaks, these things can be repaired and replaced.
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[It's hard not to feel a little warm fuzz at Kazuma's words.]